I have just finished viewing the Korean movie "200 Pounds of Beauty" on CrunchyRoll...and I actually have tears in my eyes.



Even though some of the parts were pretty messed up -like the father-friend-rival thingy that was going on- I thought, overall, it was a wonderful movie with a beautiful plot that conveys a simple but meaningful message.

Really, why is everyone SO judgemental on superficial looks? Why is it that hidden talent or inner beauty usually goes unnoticed when the outer appearances look awful?

Why does everyone favour slim...no, thin bodies, pretty faces, gorgeous hair, nice butts, nice boops for the ladies and never ending legs?

The heroine in the movie was fat and ugly, and nobody liked her. Everyone snobbed her. She couldn't even confess to the guy she liked, and it became worse when she over heard him saying that he was just using her.



She had a beautiful voice, but because of her looks and physique, she had to stay backstage and sing while a sexy, mini skirt donning bimbo lip synced to her song on stage.

Then she went for an "Extreme Makeover" and everything changed. She even got off scot free after causing a guy to bleed profusely from his head after ramming her car into his. But when I said everything, I meant everything. Her once loving attitude towards her dad and friend also changed.



Then...blah blah blah...the movie went on, you'll have to watch it yourself to see what happens. But of course the ending is always happy. She gets to keep her new sexy body and soulful voice, and her fans still accept her even after her confession.

However, the real world isn't like this is it?

This movie had a very special meaning for me - it reminded me when I was anorexic, half dead due to starvation but gorgeous to some guys. I had uncles who sell durian giving me pet names ("Hello, Xiao Wei!" The horror...) when I bought the fruit from them.

Gosh, what were they thinking?! What was I thinking?!

Of course I do try to convince myself that I look fine the way I am now and I am still the same girl as I was back then. If people liked me then, they should still like me now right?

But the world is a harsh place. With lanky, skeletal women running around, it's difficult for a girl like me to keep my self-esteem... It's depressing. I wish the world would stop judging people like this.

Even though I am grateful to God for returning me the things that I lost during my anorexia, I still want to be slim. I want to return to 50 kg.

Lord, grant me the strength to fulfill this twisted dream of mine...


*crying*

Labels: Musings