Why do I feel so detached from the world..?

What is the purpose? What, the heck, am I doing here?

Why am I living..?

Today seems so...numb... It's like I've thrown
up another barrier around me to hide behind.
It muffles out everything. The sounds, I can't hear... The sights, I just glaze over... The sensations upon my fingertip, I can't feel them... The emotions, they flicker like a dying flame... My mind, a blank... A suffocatingly thick blanket covers me...

I'm a total opposite of my little brother - I don't think at all. I hate thinking.

Hmm... This rant is probably due to my surging hormones, yes, I'm going through PMS... CSAS is probably another contributing factor, it weighs heavily down on me. Not to mention my grandparents. They have recently come to stay, the way they are always calling me makes me feel hunted. My grandfather dirtied himself yesterday...a sign?

I should probably stop. I so want to do a film review but I just can't seem to pull it together to write anymore.

Remember? I hate thinking.


*blank stare*

Labels: Musings